What do sharks have to do with toasters?
Toasters kill 400 people each year. Sharks kill between five and 10.
Why then does a shark cage resemble the internal mechanics of a toaster? Is it a cruel joke to make me even more nervous than I already am?
It’s a cool late September morning in Kleinbaai, South Africa, a small coastal village about a two-hour drive from Cape Town.
The sun is shining but the breeze is growing, whipping up the sea, as about 40 of us tuck into bacon, eggs and rolls while absorbing the safety briefing.
We are going to swim with great white sharks and while I’m more than anxious my mate Damien Michie, the winner of Foxtel’s Ultimate Rugby fan competition, couldn’t be calmer.
“Can’t wait,” he chirps at 6.30am. “I’m looking forward to being close to the sharks in a controlled environment so I know they’re not going to have me for lunch.
“I’m more excited than scared. I think we will be in good hands.”
Seals line the shore. Picture: The Ultimate Rugby Fan Damien Michie
Keep your hands inside the cage
Speaking of hands, the safety message is simple – don’t stick any appendages outside the shark cage. Message received loud and clear.
The people at Marine Dynamics are experts in cage shark diving, a tourism industry that is booming in this part of the world. They have been conducting tours since the late 1990s and their sleek boat Slashfin is really comfortable as it bounces through the waves on our 10-minute ride out to shark alley.
This area is a popular breeding ground for seals. And great white sharks – which are believed to have been around for about 70 million years – love to eat seals. Someone jokes that this is the marine world equivalent of a Sizzler smorgasbord for sharks.
I nervously laugh as I squeeze myself into a black wetsuit and realise that I now look a lot like a giant seal.
The dive cage is 4m long and 1m wide. After we drop anchor it is lowered over the side of the boat – almost completely underwater.
The crew, a lot of them volunteers with a myriad of accents from around the world, start tossing a homemade burley into the water.
Like any wild animal activity there is no guarantee of what you will see on the day. But from the smell of this burley we are sure to attract something.
Once the sharks arrive … it’s all action
This process takes about 15 minutes. While we wait a southern right whale breaches, not once but three times, near the boat. Amazing.
No one gets into the cage until the sharks arrive. And when they do everything happens at a frenetic pace.
Tourists in the shark cage. Picture: The Ultimate Rugby Fan Damien Michie
Baits are dangled above the water to lure the sharks closer and closer to the cage. You can hear a communal gasp as the first great white breaks the water and bares its Colgate grin. The first eight people slip into the chilly 15C water. The visibility was at 5m.
Our guide shouts “dive” as the shark approaches and everyone ducks to get a glimpse. A tail clips the cage and everyone pushes backwards. Some push the person next to them forward.
You don’t have an allotted time in the water. The guide gets you out when he thinks you have seen your fair share of sharks. That’s usually between 30 and 40 minutes. The dives are repeated over a two-hour period. Some people get to dive twice. Some people opt not to get in the water at all.
Despite what anyone says, it is a test of your nerves and sharks are high on everyone’s list of animals not to mess with.
Some spend their time being sick – especially on rough-water days like this.
It is a life-changing event
Those who do get in the water though will never forget it. There’s nothing like the blue-eyed stare of a great white to make you realise how lucky you are to be floating in a solid cage of iron.
The largest shark spotted on the day was “Big Spot” who measures just a tad over 4.3m. The smallest of the 11 sharks sighted was Little Roundy who is just under 2m.
After our land legs had returned we headed back to the seaside town of Hermanus, on the southern coast of the Western Cape.
The town used to be called Hermanuspietersfontein but the name had to be shortened because it was too long for the postal service.
The Marine Hotel, which sits on the cliffs of Walker Bay, is regarded as one of the best land-based spots from which to watch whales in South Africa.
The building shimmers white in the afternoon sunlight. Most of the 40 rooms have stunning views either up or down the coast. Some suites have separate lounges decorated in a shabby chic style.
Great white cruises past the tourist boat. Picture: The ultimate Rugby Fan Damien Michie
South Africa offers great value for money
South Africa, thanks to our strong dollar and their poor rand, is an incredibly cheap destination for Australians – even when you are staying in a 5-star hotel like this.
This hotel reminded me of Rae’s on Watego’s at Byron Bay where rooms start at about $700 a night. Here they start at $300.
An imported beer at the bar will cost you less than $2. A six-course degustation meal with matching wines can be had for about $40. And everyone knows how good South African wine is so it would be rude not to try a few.
The only thing I didn’t try out was in the in-room toaster – can’t be too careful, can you?
The statistics at the start of the story were provided by Marine Dynamics.
Staying there: The Marine Hermanus is part of The Collection. Rates start from about $300 a night.
Getting there: South African Airways flies from Sydney and Perth to Johannesburg with connections to Cape Town.