Lost in Wayne’s World driving a Bentley

IF YOU are going to get lost it might as well be while you are driving a Bentley. That’s my opinion anyway.

It wasn’t my fault. Getting lost that is. I blame Wayne, my co-pilot.

We were driving a Bentley from Brisbane to Noosa for the Noosa International Food & Wine Festival.

I calculate that I have driven this road 30 times in the past 20 years. I always go the same way, but Wayne, is a man who thinks outside the square. A free spirit.

“My way is so much faster,’’ he says confidently. We drove past the first Noosa exit. “I’ve been going this way for years,’’ he says as we pass the second exit.

“Are you sure?” I ask as he motions me to head further north with the third – and final – Noosa exit sign disappearing in the rear-view mirror.

We cruise past signs for Yurol and then Pomona. I sacked Wayne, and banished him to the back seat, at Federal and engaged the Bentley’s navigation system to deliver us safely to Hastings St and the Outrigger Hotel’s welcoming reception desk.

Bentley Brisbane had loaned me the car – if it is fair to call a Bentley a car. I think they realised I couldn’t afford one when I rolled up to collect it driving a decade-old Honda CRV.

Nonetheless they gave me the keys and Wayne, myself, and our wives Ali and Barb were thankful.

The Bentley is more a statement than anything else. People buy flashy cars such as Porsches when they want to impress. The dealer at Brisbane Bentley tells me clients drive a Bentley when they no longer need to impress. It’s obviously a sales pitch, but it does sound good.

It rumbles when you start it. People turn their heads when you drive it down the street. And when I parked it at The Outrigger it became a mini tourist attraction itself. Fellow guests would gather around it. Some even had their photos taken with it.

I find the Outrigger the perfect base for enjoying Noosa’s big food and wine festival. The rooms are private. The views over the treetops to the water are outstanding.

And because you have a little uphill walk to get back to the hotel at the end of the day, you don’t feel too bad for having indulged at the festival.

The festival itself is very relaxed. It is a low-key celebration of tasty food and wine. You can bump into celebrity chefs or chat with famous winemakers if so inclined. You can dance the afternoon, and early evening, away to live music.

Or you can do what lots of people do and plonk yourself down in a beanbag under a tree, nibble on some food, sip some wine, and nod off dreaming of Nigella.

You don’t have to be a dedicated foodie to join some of the 25,000-plus people who head to the festival each year. You just have to enjoy eating and drinking. The perfect combination.

Sadly I don’t have the Bentley for this year’s festival, but for three years running I will be back in Noosa for the Food and Wine Festival.